Tuesday, November 30, 2010

P90X Day 3 and 4 Kenpo / Legs and Back / ABS X

It's been four days and I have stayed focused on the P90X funny most people post their 30 days 60 and 90 and I'm excited about my fourth lol.
Friday I unfortunately mixed up the two workouts and by accident I completed KenpoX - I don't think it will make a dramatic difference, as I'm still learning the routines themselves. Kenpo was mainly focused on martial arts cardio ! It was hard, but I was able to handle it - I took frequent breaks and was very focused on listening to my body. I had a recovery drink, and during the day I think I had yogurt with granola and raspberries - almonds and then for dinner my sin ... pizza, 3 pieces - but I only had two beers and spent the evening being fairly well behaved, so I could handle this am.

I realized this morning I skipped over a routine - LEGS / Back and ABX. I kept wondering why I didn't have another ABX routine. Once I figured it out I performed the workout, I think I am really struggling with balance.I also need to focus on my amount of reps and depth of reps.
I am really struggling with it - but again did the best i could
I of course had a recovery drink, and went to mow the lawn about 1/2 way through I had a 1/2 of a muscle milk bar = tasty - chewy - I then moved onto raspaerries :)

I can feel my body reacting - it's positive :)

Friday, November 5, 2010

[-02.20] P90X - Still Bringing it !

It's been a while since i've written online, and admittedly I have not had a good week of eating... but ... but I'm pleased to announce that I have stayed focused and am still on track. After traveling to Ontario, I took a full ten days off, my knee was driving me nutz, swollen, ugh ! But what worked out well, is I restarted, and Beth joined me in the daily regime. Even better, we have been getting up at 6 AM and focused on a full hour of bringing it with P90X !
The weekends, we take off, so we are working out 5 days a week, but what I really like about it is that it feels like our job, our routine. Just another 9 days to our good habit !

Today I weighed in - I have lost a few more ! So pleased with myself - still focused !

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

[-02.90] P90X

I have been faithfully working out - I have committed - and I deserve it. Damn it I am finally seeing progress and I feel good !!!
As people have been asking me what I have been doing, I have explained that I have not been making food my enemy, and instead I've been making some adjustments, but the single most effective part of my success, clearly working out.
I overheard Kelly Osbourne ... "I've worked hard" - and I get it.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

p90X - Tuesday !!! PLYO BABY

I have to say yesterday i was feeling bottom of the barrel ! I struggled like mad getting downstairs and working out. Big mistake deciding to wait longer in the day and execute at 4, but thankfully I did get it done !
Today was PLYO - YEAH ME !
It was better no doubt an improvement from last week and dammit it was tough ! I feel good though had a good recovery with smushed bananner in it - delish !

Saturday, September 25, 2010

P90 PX - Still going

OK I missed Wednesdays Yoga - day of hell ! but i got right back on the 90PX train and got my self together completing Back and Legs and today KEMPO X.
By the way, love Back and Legs, and Kempo felt way easier this time ...

Phew Ok I have now made it officially 9 Whole days _ I excluded yoga day which would of made it 10.

It occurred to me this AM when doing KEMPO X - you know what, I deserve this ! I want to encourage anyone out there reading my blog, frustrated, overwhelmed - consider it an opportunity to take care of yourself and to give something back to yourself. NO DOUBT ~ YOU DESERVE IT !

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

P90X Bring it PLYOS

Today was plyometrics - hard core cardio !
I'm sitting here watching the start of the season of the Biggest Loser feeling so thankful that for today (and for the past 7) I have taken back control ! My body aches with the feeling of movement, and it's fantastic ! I'm still being very cautious, I can't do everything, I can't last every minute, every rep - but I am pushing myself as hard as I can - being more cognizant about what I eat more than ever !

Todays Meals
9:30 Protein drink
12:20 Banana and nutrigrain bar
3:20 Yogurt / Banana /Raspberry smoothie
> licked a spoon from cupcakes I was making
7:15 Lean burger, 1 pt bread with a slice of cheese and grilled onions - and a sweet potato with I can't believe it's not butter / brown sugar and cinnamon.

I'm watching these people struggling with their weight on the biggest looser, what strikes me is how much they are wanting like a person in need of a root canal that hates dentists - begging to please help them. I can relate to that, but their stories are amazing.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

P90X YOGA - oui !

P90X Yoga, a full hour and a half of (at least for me) challenging yoga ! I struggled struggled struggled, but kept focused and completed from start to finish trying almost everything (there was one pose poised on the back of my neck, which didn't look like a good idea to me.  I can see how this would clearly elongate and develop ones flexibility. 
I think of  my biggest struggle in this was 3 things
1.  Unsure of how to do YOGA (needed to watch assess and execute
2.  Excess fat in my way
3.  Lack of balance

I feel as if I can address #1 and #2, #3 will come together. 

After I had a hearty breakfast 1/2 c yogurt, banana, raspberries, granola - ellie enjoyed it to. 
Till tomorrow I believe is Day 5 Legs &Back, Ab RipperX
I'm going to check to see if there is any special equipment needed.

But as Tony Horton says ... please see the video on why YOGA SUCKS ! lol

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

P90X - Day 1

So I searched and searched and searched for P90X and finally found it ! I love social networking, I contacted my friend on FB who is a librarian and she was able to track down the whole set for me at St. John Fisher College, of which I'm an alumni.  After visiting 5 different buildings, I was finally able to check out the videos for a week.
Yesterday I spent the day reviewing the product, today I wrote up a plan and since it was Wednesday, I decided to start with DAY 3 of Week 1.  While I had no weights to assist me I decided to perform the workout to get a better understanding of what the work out was, focus on my form, and to ensure I could do it. 

Surprisingly I was able to handle this workout quite well, I can't wait to do it again with some 7 lb weights.  It was completely my style of workout.  What does that mean... well break down the work WORK - OUT it means you have to WORK (exertion or effort directed to produce or accomplish something; labor; toil).  I don't want to have the impression that it's FUN, or that I LIKE IT, or that I'm DANCING - I want to get in and get the business done!

This work out was 3X longer and 1000X more tolerable to me.  Well, I still have to do tomorrow.  I really liked working in the basement, I had the whole "gym" to myself - the dog didnt' make fun of me when I couldn't do something or if I looked silly, it was temperately cool, and I could just wear my sportbra (I'm pretty sure I'd be thrown out of a gym if I did that) and shorts.
After, I had to still do the AB X Video - HOLY COW ! Hard work, but I did the best job I could do, and will "bring it" next time I meet that video (which by the way is 3 x a week).  After I was done, I came up and made a recovery drink... protein protein protein to help my muscles recover. 

All in all a good day of training :)

Glad something is keeping me busy and focused. :)

Thursday, August 26, 2010

SCALE SHAME, but probabally a good thing

OH, such shame last night was experienced ... Beth is traumatized with her recent summer weight gain of at least 10 lbs, and Maureen not so happy either, me I think at times I become so apathetic to it I forget how unhappy I am with my weight.  We all were marched upstairs to step onto the scale and face each other, I wanted to crawl into the cabinet - UGH.

So we have all faced the music with our current weight and are now accountable to one another to call and or text our food intake for the day (confessions and/or successes).  This is a good thing. 

Sunday, May 23, 2010


I was 224.7 earlier this week - have my period today - oh just weighed myself - coming in at 228 - I love bloating.  Despite the changes in my personal life (career front) I've stayed rather focused over the past few weeks. 
I've been working like a dog outside ... and even going to the gym.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Worries over the weekend

I started writing this post on Friday, I thought it would be a good idea to reflect on my next three days and isolate what am I worried about.  I have a few things that pop up immediately.  Tonight we are going to dinner with Lynn and Janet, we typically get a Fish Fry - 14 points - alone - can I balance the rest of the meal? More specifically, how will I balance the rest of the meal, it's not a question of can I, more how will I, it has to be a non-negotiable !  What else tempts me... beer, wine, cheesecake, rolls, mmmmmm.... will I even enjoy my time out or will I obsess obsess obsess? 

What will be an effective way to handle extra calories/points eaten...what are my choices... go into the slump? or make a choice to burn it off - I have to be willing to let myself be, but be willing to renew my energy and not feel that absolute shame. 
In addition, my friends shower is this weekend, I have the same question ... what will the food options be, how will I prepare myself?

Oh, and Nephew Birthday party is this weekend, I have the same question.... what will we eat ... pizza? wings? cake? I must take that proactive approach and plan for success ....

Sunday, May 9, 2010


Weighed in at 229.4

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Staying on Track over the weekend .. Friday Saturday and Sunday Morning at 226.4

Friday I had really managed my caloric intake all day, thinking about what I was going to have for dinner, it was Janet's birthday and I knew we were going out to dinner at Union Hill for a fish fry.  I had scheduled into my day a 14 point fish fry and veggies veggies veggies - a few glasses of wine and beer.  I ordered a salad for dinner and another salad with my dinner - I just kept eating salad - lol

When we are with them, we can be soooo naughty, but I made out pretty well I was so disappointed yesterday, we were going to go to a chicken barbecue, and didn't make it there till 5:30 - bummer, it was all gone :(  - so we had to go with Pizza, not that I'm devastated from having to eat pizza, but I was certainly trying to do my best to stay on track - now here is the good news, I'm not off track - I feel focused and committed - frustrated that when other circumstances are not within my control it's a challenge to plan effectively. 

Saturday, however was the real challenge, it was a day I had clearly planned.  We were going to go to a chicken barbecue, but unfortunately, they were all out by the time we go there - so we had to order Pizza.  It was completely delicious :) but I think today I have to thoughtfully plan, I'm going to two events with out having any food within my control and so I think I really really need to plan. 
Ok - i'm off to do my planning :)

Friday, April 30, 2010

[+01.90] Weight Watchers online

It's Friday morning - I felt I needed to post - the WW online was the best thing I could of done for myself ! No stupid meetings where we talk about what we ate, just the facts...recorded, what do you weight, what did you do, how do you feel, as we say in education .... the Data doesn't LIE !

I started off this week strong, shocking the hell out of my system with vegetables ... it continued, it's now growing accustomed.  I have decided to take my official weight on Monday and Friday and monitor over the weekend.

I have even managed to exercise with yoga, ballet, dog walking, and lawn mowing.  This morning I weighed in at 225.7 reduced from my starting recorded weight at 233. 

I had so much water weight, salt retention, and toxins in my body I feel as if I'm purging.  I haven't been hungry and while trying to eat in my point range, I'm about 8 off - but that will be helpful in the weekend. I have sworn off french fries and more then 2 servings of bread, attempting to avoid it in general ... makes me thing,we should buy whole wheat pasta, that would be a better choice.

So far the online tools have been great, I can keep track on my itouch and am going to look into downloading it on my BB.
I read my previous post... I felt such shame and anger towards myself - now that's not gone, but I would certainly say that I feel as if I have taken ownership.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

My Tipping Point - Going Private

It's is April 25, 2010. We just got back from Sanibel .... had an awesome trip, I'm confident it's going to be busy returning back to work. However this was a tough week for me emotionally. Normally in visiting my parents I'm emotionally exhausted from my parents, but while that still had it's ups and downs - my true devastation was clearly myself and my weight. I came home today reflecting on how many stories I had to tell, and I wasn't willing to share them because I had made a public blog. I've been doing so horrible on my food and health choices in general, I had essentially absolved myself any responsibility, just not posting. Tonight I made it private. I realized I have a story ... I may not feel comfortable telling anyone else, but at the very least I have to write it down and admit it to myself.
It seems to hit closer to home seeing my dad, in once conversation he called himself disabled, I found myself pushing myself harder than normal, not complaining and feeling like I was not just enormous, but finding strategies to work around my body.
My legs hurt this week, in between them where my thighs hurt. In the hot weather or after the beach they rubbed together fiercely. I found myself constantly applying talcum powered, it was so uncomfortable.
At the airport today, I furiously moved my feet to stay up with Beth, tonight I feel my right foot cramping... I think of Cherie her struggle with weight and her leg cramps.
Buying clothing I almost had to buy size 24 ... my heart is heavy.
Beth took photos of my over the week - I look in a word enormous

 When I wear capris I have a FUPA ... http://fupahunter.blogspot.com/ I have to admit, I am happier then I have ever been, but my weight clearly depresses the hell out of me.  I don't understand how my partner can even tolerate me, I'm disgusting.  I know it may seem to an external person that I'm whining or complaining, but the truth is I think I'm just trying to be as honest as I can.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

[-01.80] STIR Fry: Awesome !

Ok, I'm making progress ... Last night was a new dish for me ... stir fry! It may not sound terribly exciting, but it turned out Fantastic, a couple of tweeks and we will have a stellar Asian addition to the kitchen. For dessert, I stopped on my way home and grabbed some diet root beer, caffeine free - we designed a master "RB Float" - totally absolved my sweet craving.

I found out last night that my father is going in for an angiogram - calcification around his arteries... noted in his doctors appointment, we'll I've lived a sedentary life. I guess I question how close am I to his "sedentary life" I think I would say I'm close (live my world sitting on a keyboard). I need to work on this.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Starting Again

Well tomorrow is February 22, 2010. I truly started this project with the best of intentions. When it comes to my weight - it always starts like that. I just returned from my trip to Florida and I'm resetting my goals and my vision for what I believe I can do. This past week we have been watching the Olympics. Ann Curry had twittered ... "Olympians Shawn, Seth, and Evan all said focusing intently on goals was key to winning gold. So what is your goal?". Such a simple tool twitter, but I will admit it make me pause for myself and stop and think ... why am I not successful, why do I think I can't do ... the only thing stopping me from succeeding is me. Vingies wrote one day when she was twittering how she was going to run a marathon one afternoon - I kicked off a kudos to her and remember saying ... wish I could run a marathon - she twittered back ... "Kaarn" you can do anything you set your mind do. She's right
Seeing my Father this weekend re grounding my effort of the importance of this. I'm going to again start with the small step of just 20 LBS by April 15, 2010 - that gives me about 7 full weeks - an average of 3 lbs a week that should be good.

[+02.40] Not the best choice

What do you want for dinner honey....?


Oh ok....

Tortilla chips, cheese, sour cream, guacamole - those are naughty
95 % beef and salsa - not too naughty

End result

"UGH, I feel sick"
"Yeah, me too"

Sunday, February 21, 2010

45 days later

Well tomorrow is February 22, 2010.

My last post was January 7, 2010 – well over 40 days.

I just returned from my trip to Florida and I'm resetting my goals and my vision for what I believe I can do.
This past week we have been watching the Olympics. Ann Curry had twittered ... "Olympians Shawn, Seth, and Evan all said focusing intently on goals was key to winning gold. So what is your goal?" Such a simple tool, twitter, but I will admit it make me pause for myself and stop and think ...

Vingies wrote one day when she was twittering how she was going to run a marathon one afternoon - I kicked off a kudos to her and remember saying ... wish I could run a marathon - she twittered back ... Kaarn you can do anything you set your mind do. My thought… crap, she's right

It definitely frustrates me … why did I stop? It wasn’t like I wasn’t successful, but what did I get caught up on. Know what it was… Food Shame. Basically, I made some bad choices and didn’t want to own up to it using my blog. So I stopped.

The only one to blame for the failure … me.

Seeing my Father this week regrounds my effort, and why this is so important.
Watching these incredible athletes in the Olympics intensely focus to accomplish their incredible tasks reminds me of how I’m capable.
Being reminding from others that I’m the only thing standing in the way of my goal is hard to acknowledge, but truly an affirmation that I need to accept.

So here I go again. Starting with a focus on my first 20 lbs by April 15, 2010 – I have seven weeks.

Till tomorrow.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

[-02.00] Obsessed over the chicken wing

Another successful day I am watered like a healthy plant :)
In addition I made it through another Kettlebells routine, there is nothing better than walking around in your everyday life feeling your butt cheeks and thighs are reacting to the complete shock of movement - and instead of ouch you think, oh it's working !

For anyone not familiar ... here is a quick clip :)

Dinner is pretty simple tonight, inventive quiches - I wish it were better, but the RED HOT Buffalo Wing Sauce drizzled on the top makes it rather palatable.

Did you know that wing sauce has only 5 calories?

Wing Sauce has now led me to researching a recipe focused on lower fat skinless chicken wings. Not that there are any frozen chicken wings in the freezer or anything. Although now that I think about it, I had Buffalo Wing sauce on my eggs, which is technically a chicken... so I believe I may have successfuly found the most low fat relationship to the chicken wing ... I digress

Ok so here is the breakdown
Calories in a chicken wing cooked and roasted
A Calories 99
Total Fat 6.6g


Calories in Chicken, Wing, Meat Only
Calories 43
Total Fat 1.7g

I will have to evaluate the concept of the skinless chicken wing with my friend Maureen. She's one of the most creative cooks I know, so if anyone could figure out how to make my vision - it would be her :) I will call her tonight !

Now that I'm writing this, I find it completely absurd that I'm evaluating how to make a healthy chicken wing - more amusing is the video with the buns of steel lady posted above it.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

[-00.20] Kettlebells

I have made it through day three, only 363 days to go !

This AM I kicked off the morning with a Kettlebells routine. For any of my readers that aren't familiar with this exercise, it's basically a weight with a handle that makes you focus on your core muscle groups.
I was surprised at what a simple routine it was, but how it truly made me work. I mean the match-stick lady on the video did a weight twice my size like she was cutting a knife through butter. After doing it myself, I was impressed and envious of her ease. That and her body tone that a person could do beer pong off of - she was solid !

I continued with my six simple goals today, I'm finding that it is something I can wrap my brain around, and something measurable:
1. Water
2. Packed lunches
3. Cooking
4. Dessert
5. Focused on Small Goals
6. Three Greens

I know it might sound silly, I guess I just want to take something that I know can be hard - and try to simplify it. Let's face it, the formula isn't complicated. Like cave man me say - eat less, eat better, move off rock !

Dinner tonight by the way was a delish arrangement of Pork tenderloin drizzled with Barbecue Sauce, Mustard and Honey. Cous-Cous and Broccoli.

For dessert - mmm. hot cocoa .

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

[-02.00] Change in Approach

In an effort to create some realistic goals for myself I thought today would be a good day to identify a small goal for myself that is manageable. While of course of overall goal is to weigh 130 lbs and be an incredibly fit athlete, I thought I would just address the next two weeks :)

I'm working to make changes that are manageable and not to overly dramatic.
So here are a few shifts in my approach

1. Water, water, water 16oz first thing, 16 oz at work in AM, 16oz in afternoon at work, and 16 oz when I come home in the evening.
2. Packed lunches, I am awful at preparing my lunch for the day and often it leads to me starving at 2pm searching for any sort of sugar to lift my body up.
3. Cooking, not by any means a major change, I am the cook in the house but I need to approach my dinners with flavor and cut down on calories and fat.
4. Dessert, I love dessert - desserts, there is no doubt about it - but, I love them just a bit too much. I am finding small substitutions that are clearly satisfying, or smaller amounts in general.
5. Small Goals: - my first one will be January 14, down to 220, I’ll then identify the next small hurdle.
6. Three Greens in the cart and on the plate. I am a notorious anti-vegetable eater, partly as they are not my thing, but more I think cause I’m lazy. I am working on at least three greens to be purchased and served along with dinner.

What’s for dinner:
Dinner, roasted chicken with a rub, potatoes, and green beans!
I have this awesome rub from The Big M, and now my chicky chicky is being roasted with potatoes on the bottom of the pan.

Looking at shift in approach 1-6 I’ve nailed all 6, yeah me.

Monday, January 4, 2010

[-04.40] The 2010 Foodie

Here we go a start of a Monday on January 4, 2010. I watched the movie Julie and Julia last night - loved it! I'm ... well I'm a foodie (new term I learned in the movie last night). We have recently purchased a new house (in April of 2009) and I have fallen in love with my kitchen island preparing all of the meals in the evening, although last night the cook was off. The only problem is that while I'm a foodie I'm also 5'1 and weighing in at -4.4 less lbs as of this morning. In addition to this, I take particular enjoyment with my work (computer geek and educator by day) and had such envy watching Julie blog about her experience for 365 days and some 500 plus recipes. I have written so many blogs in my time, but not been able to find the common focus that has ever made me want to "publish" out in the world. That this morning when I weighed myself I had a new focus and a new appreciation for a goal as a foodie and a fatty was to blog for 365 in the year 2010 focused on better eating, exercise, and of course cooking.